Mourners Bill of Rights...

Good morning ladies..  I had something I wanted to share this morning..  Yesterdays church service really moved me.  We were talking about missions and how everyone can do something.  God can use you.  I feel like I am living proof.  In the roughest time in my life he used me to reach out to other women who were going through the same thing that I was..  I am so honored that I have been able to do this..  My pastor said that "God can take your greatest misery and turn it into your greatest ministry". 

After delivering baby Grace at 18 wks I started reaching out to other women...  And continue to do so.  I know that when you are newly going through a loss you may feel angry at God and feel like there is no way he can use you.  For me knowing that something good has come out of losing Grace it brings me a strange sort of comfort.  Like because of her I am able to still reach out to women (over a year later).

I wish you all the peace that surpasses understanding.  I also pray that you let God use you to reach others who are going through a similar situation.   You girls are all in my thoughts and prayers. 


Verse...   "Have faith in God," Jesus answered. "I tell you the truth, if anyone says to this mountain, 'Go, throw yourself into the sea,' and does not doubt in his heart but believes that what he says will happen, it will be done for him. Therefore I tell you, whatever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours."  Mark 11:22-23 NIV



Thought for today...    When you do call for help, God has promised to respond: "When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you." Gods power is available to you right now - its just a choice away. All you have to do is believe and receive.





  
Song....  
 
 
 
 
Poem....
Mourner’s Bill of Rights.” It was written by Alan D. Wolfelt Ph.D. author, educator, grief counselor and director of the Center For Loss and Transition (http://centerforloss.com).



1. You have the right to experience your own unique grief.

No one else will grieve in exactly the same way you do. So, when you turn to others for help, don’t allow them to tell what you should or should not be feeling.



2. You have the right to talk about your grief.



Talking about your grief will help you heal. Seek out others who will allow you to talk as much as you want, as often as you want, about your grief. If at times you don’t feel like talking, you also have the right to be silent.


3. You have the right to feel a multitude of emotions.



Confusion, disorientation, fear, guilt and relief are just a few of the emotions you might feel as part of your grief journey. Others may try to tell you that feeling angry, for example, is wrong. Don’t take these judgmental responses to heart. Instead, find listeners who will accept your feelings without condition.


4. You have the right to be tolerant of your physical and emotional limits.



Your feelings of loss and sadness will probably leave you feeling fatigued. Respect what your body and mind are telling you. Get daily rest. Eat balanced meals. And don’t allow others to push you into doing things you don’t feel ready to do.


5. You have the right to experience “griefbursts.”



Sometimes, out of nowhere, a powerful surge of grief may overcome you. This can be frightening, but is normal and natural. Find someone who understands and will let you talk it out.



6. You have the right to make use of ritual.



The funeral ritual does more than acknowledge the death of someone loved. It helps provide you with the support of caring people. More importantly, the funeral is a way for you to mourn. If others tell you the funeral or other healing rituals such as these are silly or unnecessary, don’t listen.



7. You have the right to embrace your spirituality.



If faith is a part of your life, express it in ways that seem appropriate to you. Allow yourself to be around people who understand and support your religious beliefs. If you feel angry at God, find someone to talk with who won’t be critical of your feelings of hurt and abandonment.



8. You have the right to search for meaning.



You may find yourself asking, “Why did he or she die? Why this way? Why now?” Some of your questions may have answers, but some may not. And watch out for the clichéd responses some people may give you. Comments like, “It was God’s will” or “Think of what you have to be thankful for” are not helpful and you do not have to accept them.



9. You have the right to right to treasure your memories.



Memories are one of the best legacies that exist after the death of someone loved. You will always remember. Instead of ignoring your memories, find others with whom you can share them.


10. You have the right to move toward your grief and heal.



Reconciling your grief will not happen quickly. Remember, grief is a process, not an event. Be patient and tolerant with yourself and avoid people who are impatient and intolerant with you. Neither you nor those around you must forget that the death of someone loved changes your life forever.”