Verse... "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you asthe world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27 NIV
Photo of the day...
Thought for today...
Snuggle in God's arms. When you are hurting, when you feel lonely, left out. let Him cradle you, comfort you, reassure you of His all-sufficient power and love. Kay Arthur, Precept Ministries International
Song....
Poem.... This is a video tribute to all our babies who have gone too soon!
Verse... "But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." 2 Corinthians 12:9-10
Verse.... "See that you do not look down on one of these little ones. For I tell you that their angels in heaven always see the face of my Father in heaven." Matthew 18:10
Verse.... "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus. Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable--if anything is excellent or praiseworthy--think about such things." Phillipians 4:6-8 NIV
Song.... I love this new Carrie Underwood song... I hope you all enjoy as well...
Poem...
Little Angels
When God calls little children to dwell with Him above.We mortals sometimes question the wisdom of His love.for no heartache compares with the death of one small child,who does so much to make our world seem wonderful and mild.Perhaps God tires of calling the aged to His fold.So He picks a rosebud before it can grow old.God knows how much we need them and so He takes but few,to make the land of Heavenmore beautiful to view.Believing this is difficult still somehow me must try.The saddest word mankind know will always be "Goodbye".So when a child departs we who are left behind, must realize God loves children, Angels are hard to find.~Author Unknown
A little extra inspiration for today... This is the lyrics to the song "The Climb" it has been very inspirational to me over the last year.
The Climb lyrics
I can almost see it
That dream I'm dreaming but
There's a voice inside my head sayin,
You'll never reach it,
Every step I'm taking,
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking but I
Got to keep trying
Got to keep my head held high
There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb
The struggles I'm facing,
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes they knock me down but
No I'm not breaking
I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm going to remember most yeah
Just got to keep going
And I,
I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on, cause
There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes I'm gonna to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb
There's always going to be another mountain
I'm always going to want to make it move
Always going to be an uphill battle,
Sometimes you going to have to lose,
Ain't about how fast I get there,
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb
Keep on moving
Keep climbing
Keep the faith baby
It's all about
It's all about
The climb
Keep the faith
Keep your faith
Whoa a oh oh
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Verse...""I can do everything through Him who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13 NIV
Song...
Poem...
Sunday God
We try to keep God in church on Sunday morning, maybe Sunday night and the unlikely event of a mid-week service. We do like to have Him around during sickness and, of course, at funerals. However, we don't have time, or room, for Him during work or play because that's the part of our lives we think we can, and should, handle on our own. May God forgive me for ever thinking that there is a time or place where He is not to be FIRST in my life. We should always have time to remember all He has done for us. If you aren't ashamed to do this, please follow the directions. Jesus said, "If you are ashamed of me, I will be ashamed of you before my Father." Yes, I do Love God. He is my source of existence and Savior. He keeps me functioning each and everyday. Without Him, I am nothing.
Verse.... "Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you asthe world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid." John 14:27
Thought for today... Do not forget to entertain strangers, for by so doing some people have entertained angels without knowing it.
Song.....
Poem...
This was posted on a message board I frequent and it spoke volumes to me! I guess I am doing pretty well according to this. I dont think people truly understand how hard it is to "function" half-way normal after losing a baby...
If you are healing from the loss of a child and you get out of bed in the morning,
You are doing well.
If you healing from the loss of a child and you hold down a job,
You are amazing.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and and you are still remotely pleasant to others,
You are a lot nicer than me.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and you cannot always be there for a friend,
You are still a good friend and a strong enough person to know what is best for you.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and you cry daily or have nightmares,
You are normal.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and seeing happy, healthy pregnant women makes you sad, angry, jealous and worse,
Join the club
If you are healing from the loss of a child and think that what happened was your fault,
you are wrong, but you are not alone.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and feel like your significant other truly understands and is 100% supportive,
He or she is rare and a keeper.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and you have a good support system,
It will help A LOT.
If you are healing from the loss of a child and feel painfully alone and isolated,
Please know that there are thousands of people healing with you in spirit.
If you are healing from the loss of a child but still looking to the future,
Verse...but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint. Isaiah 40:31 NIV
Thought for today... We stand as tall as angels when we kneel to help a friend.
Verse......"I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more important than food, and the body more important than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? "And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labour or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendour was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, "What shall we eat?" or "What shall we drink?" or "What shall we wear?" For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." Matthew 6:19-34
Song.....
Poem....
Do Babies Grow Up in Heaven?
by Unknown
Will I know my baby when we meet again?
Will he have grown up, not be the infant that died in my arms?
Will I recognize him, be able to find him among so many others?
Or will he be a stranger to me, not knowing who I am,
or me knowing him?
Do babies grow up in heaven?
He never got his first tooth, or said his first words.
No first shoes, no Santa, no first birthday cake.
Will my son still be a baby when we meet again?
Do babies grow up in heaven?
Who sings him precious lullabies?
Who holds him close and kisses him everyday?
Who tells him constantly that they love him?
Do babies grow up in heaven?
When we next meet, will he know me?
Will he want to know me?
Will he be my son who died at three months, or a man, fully grown?
Will I have the joy of being a mother to my son for all eternity?
Do babies grow up in heaven?
Will I be able to hold him, love him, sing lullabies to him?
Will I be able to hold his tiny hand, or will it be a man's hand?
Will I ever have the joy that only holding my son can bring?
I need to know! In heaven, is my baby still a baby?
Verse...."Though you have made me see troubles, many and bitter, you will restore my life again; from the depths of the earth you will again bring me up. You will increase my honor and comfort me once again." Psalm 71:20-21
Verse... "Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.." Phillipians 4:6-7 NIV
Song.....
Poem...
God, Take This Child....
by Nancy Scott
Sweet child whom we never really got to know,
It’s hard for us to let you go.
We waited and we wanted you.
We had so many dreams for you.
We think of smiles we'll never see.
We think of events that will never be.
There will be no first steps and no first teeth.
There is only a void and our own grief.
We planned to take you to places far and near.
We yearned to keep you safe and free from fear.
We hoped to show you much of your new world.
We wanted to teach you as your life unfurled.
It’s hard to understand why you, our baby, died.
We feel so numb right now, many tears we’ve cried.
We have so many questions and no answers seem to come.
We tried so hard to save you; nothing could be done.
God, we stand before you broken-hearted
and ask you to heal these lives that must be parted
from this little one we can no longer hold,
who will always be a part of us, even when we're old.)
Verse... "For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through the endurance taught in the Scriptures and the encouragement they provide we might have hope."
Song...This was played at Grace's memorial service. It is called "A Baby's Prayer" It is a beautiful song, but I will warn you it will make you cry!
Some thoughts for today....
The Truth Is... by Elizabeth Carney
1. The truth isn't that you will feel "all better" in a couple of days, or weeks, or even months.
The truth is that the days will be filled with an unending ache and the nights will feel one million sad years long for a while. Healing is attained only after the slow necessary progression through the stages of grief and mourning.
2. The truth isn't that a new pregnancy will help you forget.
The truth is that, while thoughts of a new pregnancy soon may provide hope, a lost infant deserves to be mourned just as you would have with anyone you loved. Grieving takes a lot of energy and can be both emotionally and physically draining. This could have an impact upon your health during another pregnancy. While the decision to try again is a very individualized one, being pregnant while still actively grieving is very difficult.
3. The truth isn't that pills or alcohol will dull the pain.
The truth is that they will merely postpone the reality you must eventually face in order to begin healing. However, if your doctor feels that medication is necessary to help maintain your health, use it intelligently and according to his/her instructions.
4. The truth isn't that once this is over your life will be the same.
The truth is that your upside-down world will slowly settle down, hopefully leaving you a more sensitive, compassionate person, better prepared to handle the hard times that everyone must deal with sooner or later. When you consider that you have just experienced one of the worst things that can happen to a family, as you heal you will become aware of how strong you are.
5. The truth isn't that grieving is morbid, or a sign of weakness or mental instability.
The truth is that grieving is work that must be done. Now is the appropriate time. Allow yourself the time. Feel it, flow with it. Try not to fight it too often. It will get easier if you expect that it is variable, that some days are better than others. Be patient with yourself. There are no short cuts to healing. The active grieving will be over when all the work is done.
6. The truth isn't that grief is all-consuming.
The truth is that in the midst of the most agonizing time of your life, there will be laughter. Don't feel guilty. Laugh if you want to. Just as you must allow yourself the time to grieve, you must also allow yourself the time to laugh. Viewing laughter as part of the healing process, just as overwhelming sadness is now, will make the pain more bearable.
7. The truth isn't that one person can bear this alone.
The truth is that while only you can make the choices necessary to return to the mainstream of life a healed person, others in your life are also grieving and are feeling very helpless. As unfair as it may seem, the burden of remaining in contact with family and friends often falls on you. They are afraid to "butt in," or they may be fearful of saying or doing the wrong thing. This makes them feel even more helpless. They need to be told honestly what they can do to help. They don't need to be told, "I'm doing fine" when you're really NOT doing fine. By allowing others to share in your pain and assist you with your needs, you will be comforted and they will feel less helpless.
8. The truth isn't that God must be punishing you for something.
The truth is that sometimes these things just happen. They have happened to many people before you, and they will happen to many people after you. This was not an act of any God; it was an act of Nature. It isn't fair to blame God, or yourself, or anyone else. Try to understand that it is human nature to look for a place to put the blame, especially when there are so few answers to the question, "Why?" Sometimes there are answers. Most times there are not. Believing that you are being punished will only get in the way of your healing.
9. The truth isn't that you will be unable to make any choices or decisions during this time.
The truth is that while major decisions, such as moving or changing jobs, are better off being postponed for now, life goes on. It will be difficult, but decisions dealing with the death of your baby (seeing and naming the baby, arranging and/or attending a religious ritual, taking care of the nursery items you have acquired) are all choices you can make for yourself. Well-meaning people will try to shelter you from the pain of this. However, many of us who have suffered similar losses agree that these first decisions are very important. They help to make the loss real. Our brains filter out much of the pain early on as a way to protect us. Very soon after that, we find ourselves reliving the events over and over, trying to remember everything. This is another way that we acknowledge the loss. Until the loss is real, grieving cannot begin. Being involved at this early time will be a painful experience, but it will help you deal with your grief better as you progress by providing comforting memories of having performed loving, caring acts for your baby.
10. The truth isn't that you will be delighted to hear that a friend or other loved one has just given birth to a healthy baby.
The truth is that you may find it very difficult to be around mothers with young babies. You may be hurt, or angry, or jealous. You may wonder why you couldn't have had that joy. You may be resentful, or refuse to see friends with new babies. You may even secretly wish that the same thing would happen to someone else. You want someone to understand how it feels. You may also feel very ashamed that you could wish such things on people you love or care about, or think that you must be a dreadful person. You aren't. You're human, and even the most loving people can react this way when they are actively grieving. If the situations were reversed, your friends would be feeling and thinking the same things you are. Forgive yourself. It's OK. These feelings will eventually go away.
11. The truth isn't that all marriages survive this difficult time.
The truth is that sometimes you might blame one another, resent one another, or dislike being with one another. If you find this happening, get help. There are self-help groups available or grief counselors who can help. Don't ignore it or tuck it away assuming it will get better. It won't. Actively grieving people cannot help one another. It is unrealistic, like having two people who were blinded at the same time teach each other Braille. Talking it out with others may help. It might even save your marriage.
12. The truth isn't that eventually you will accept the loss of your baby and forget all about this awful time.
The truth is that acceptance is a word reserved for the understanding you come to when you've successfully grieved the loss of a parent, or a grandparent, or a beloved older relative. When you lose a child, your whole future has been affected, not your past. No one can really accept that. But there is resolution in the form of healing and learning how to cope. You will survive. Many of us who have gone through this type of grief are afraid we might forget about our babies once we begin to heal. This won't happen. You will always remember your precious baby because successful grieving carves a place in your heart where he or she will live forever
Romans 15:4
Verse... "Commit your way to the Lord, trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun." Psalm 37:5-6
Thought for today.... Think to yourself: "How can I honor God in this situation?"
Song/video....
Poem...Found online I hold no rights to this poem. Author unknown
Verse...1.There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven: 2.a time to be born and a time to die, a time to plant and a time to uproot, 3.a time to kill and a time to heal, a time to tear down and a time to build, 4.a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance, 5.a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them, a time to embrace and a time to refrain, 6.a time to search and a time to give up, a time to keep and a time to throw away, 7.a time to tear and a time to mend, a times to be silent and a time to speak, 8.a time to love and a time to hate, a time for war and a time for peace. Ecclesiastes 3
Song....A friend passed this song onto me. I have tried to make it my theme song through my pregnancy losses. Something to remind me where I can find my comfort during the rough times.. I hope you all enjoy it.
Poem.....
Just For TodayJust for today, I will try to live through the next 24 hours...not expecting to get over my child's death, but learning to live with it...one day at a time
Just for today, I'll remember my child's life, not his death, and bask in the comfort of the treasured days and moments we shared.
Just for today, I will forgive all the family and friends who didn't help or comfort me the way I needed them to. They truly did not know how.
Just for today, I will reach out to comfort a relative or friend of my child. For they are hurting too, and perhaps we can help each other.
Just for today, I will free myself from my self-inflicted burden of guilt. For deep in my heart, I know if there was anything in this world I could have done to save my child from death, I would have done it.
Just for today, I will honor my child's memory by doing something with another child, be it my own, or someone else's, because I know that would make my child proud.
Just for today, I will offer my hand in friendship to other bereaved parents, fo I DO know how they feel.
Just for today, I will smile...no matter how much I hurt on the inside...for maybe if I smile a little, my heart will soften and I will begin to heal.
Just for today, I will allow myself to be happy and enjoy myself, for I know I am not deserting my child by moving on.
Just for today, I will accept that I did NOT die when my child did. My life did go on and I am the ONLY one who can make that life worthwhile again.
~by V.Tushingham, taken from the Bereaved Parents of the USA Tampa Bay Newsletter, Sept 2001.
Prayer for today...
This was posted on a message board I frequent for women who have lost babies/pregnancies. The author lost twin boys at the same gestational age that I lost Grace. This explains everything I feel.. I hope she doesnt mind that I borrowed this.
Dear God, You have given me this experience so that I may grow stronger in my faith and in my compassion for others. I ask that You not leave me alone during my time of most need. I hope You understand that the feelings that I am having of anger, frustration, sadness, grief, confusion; along with the thoughts of any blame towards You, are because I do not fully understand your plans for me, and things did not go as I had hoped. Please help me be still in this moment in my life and not become anxious about the future, because I know that You are already there. Just like I must feel pain while a deep physical wound is healing, help me through the pain that I feel in my heart. I know that if I do not allow myself to fully embrace my pain, the deep puncture in my heart might take a very long time to heal, and it will become a burden to me in years to come. I thank you for allowing me to be attacked, just as Job was attacked, so I may learn from these experiences. I am not afraid because I know You are with me, and this state is only temporary. I must not run away from my unpleasant feelings; as it is through violent earthquakes and volcanic eruptions that new lands are born. So allow me to fully feel the anger and frustration in my heart, and help me release it in healthy ways; I must let this erupt so I can move on. Allow me to release the feelings in my heart and the thoughts in my head when they no longer serve a purpose in my life. In Jesus’ name I pray, Amen.
I would like to dedicate today's post to our friend Jacelyn, who recently lost her precious Julia. We know that Julia is resting in the arms of Jesus. Please send your prayers to her family, for peace and comfort. It is a devastating loss!
